College Supply Haul

So last weekend, I went a little over-budget (although it doesn't look like it!) to get some supplies for my new college course. I technically haven't really finished, because I still need to get my lab coat and some steel-toed boots but once I got those I officially have everything I need. More or less. I hope. I'm kiiiiind of running out of money but...well, we don't need to talk about this. 

DOCTOR WHO BUTTONS/BADGES (£2.99)

I got these from in store at Waterstones, They, unfortunately, do not sell those online but they're really pretty. I really love the badges you can get at Waterstones, I have a couple on my college bag already. They're usually around £1 each so to get a pack of branded ones for £3 was really good...or that's how I rationalised it in my mind. 

(sorry for the poor quality, I should eventually invest in a better quality one at some point, this is just a phone camera)

RING BINDER (£2.49)

Again, this is store only and I don't usually buy cardboard ring binders but we don't really need it for anything but handouts because I have my paper kept in my notebook. I usually buy plastic, and I usually buy the kind you can bend so I don't break it quickly or have those annoying little...you know, those line things? I don't know if you know what I'm talking about, probably not. 

NU ERA NOTEBOOK (around £5)

I can't seem to find this online, either, but it's a realllllly cool notebook. It's split into five sections. The first section is just some lined paper, three-hundred pages I believe. After that, it has some math paper for the one hour math class I have per week. Then we have some plain paper, some study card sheets and then the last section is just a flappy little section for holding handouts and stuff.

DIVIDERS (75p) AND PUNCHED POCKETS

Pretty basic, really. The dividers matched the file pretty well, like they're the same colour, and obviously the punched pockets are to put work in that doesn't already have holes punched in them.

PAPER MATE COLOURED PENS

Usually, I would use these types of pens to write the most important parts I need to remember in colour for exams/tests/assignments, but we don't actually have any for my first year (Level 1), we only have exams in Level 2. But I just really prefer writing in colour instead of writing in boring black like school used to require us to do - one of the reasons why college is so much more fun.

CHEWIE PENCIL CASE

A very spur of the moment decision. Linked in the subtitle is the cheaper version, but I paid double somewhere because I was in a bit of a rush to get back to the train and I was very tired so I just wanted to rest for a bit. I found pencil cases I liked better, but it's so soft and has a ruler on the strap and I just really like Star Wars so hey who cares. Don't judge!

TSUM TSUM STICKERS

I am a huge fan of Tsum's. My ex-boyfriend got me my first two ever, Winnie from Winnie the Pooh and Stitch from Lilo and Stitch when I was notified that they existed as previously I didn't know. Yay, Internet! This was soon followed by four others, which I will show you in one of my next posts (a collective toy haul), I'm really exited to show them off, I just love them. These stickers were just so cute, I couldn't not get them. They weren't on my list of requirements but oh well.

ELEPHANT NOTEBOOK

Also not on my list of requirements, and a little self promo but I talk about this one in a blog where I post everyday in 2016. I got into a little bit of detail about my journal history and I hope to continue that now that I am back into blogging again. This journal is just so beautiful (which I'm sure you saw if you clicked on the subtitle link). Little expensive, but worth it. I just love journalling and I can't say I have ever really had a really pretty journal like this.

NORDIC NIGHTS COLLECTION

Unfortunately, the exact journal is not available online but you can purchase something from the collection (which I'm probably going to do and I'm trying hard not to do it. You already have something from it, Loz, hold back!). I'm probably going to use this as a journal because it's too beautiful to be anything but a source of document so I will always need it like I need all my previous journals but I'm not sure if I want it in the form of a journal or if I can use it to document things like my period (we all should do that, I think, so you can notice problems easier and such) or something but I'm not really sure. I'll find a use for it!

HIGHLIGHTERS. 

They are sooo cute. I couldn't find them on their website, I couldn't even find a lookalike, but they're little animal highlighters that are just too adorable for me to not own.

SATURN KEYCHAIN.

Again, I could not find on the website but again they do have some from the collection Retro Space, and Polka Planet (which is non-kiddie version). I love them both, though, never be ashamed to be a little kid like! As you can tell from my blog, I reaaaally love space. 

So I really hope you enjoyed my first actual blog post in a while, I hope you enjoy my future blog posts. I have reached a point in my life where I have found self-discovery, and I'm finding all these things about myself that make me really happy and I just want to share that with everyone because it's an exiting thing to come across. I'm hoping that swims out of the page!

- Loz. 

A Picture Everyday for 2016! (and some recap/resolutions).

Hey guys! Long time, no see! Well, today I am planning to take some pictures for my "What I Got for Christmas 2015" post and hopefully I will be able to get that written and posted for tomorrow afternoon, so I have very slowly but surely been getting back into the blogging spirit! Also, next weekend I am planning on going for a bit of shopping for college supplies, clothes, make-up, fun toys, I don't really know but you will see a post on that of what I came back with. Again, hopefully, I am starting college again on January and my life has been a bit wobbly on the emotional side so doing some tasks like this have really been on the bottom of my list but I need to learn that while I'm being an emotional mess my life won't wait up and I just need to get on in there. For this and many other reasons, I know 2016 is going to have many ups and downs but it mostly have downs. It's going to be a very difficult year for me, but if I succeed, a very important one too. 

If you would like to see my 2016 journey (and quite frankly, I need the encouragement), I made a blot for posting everyday in 2016 a picture. It won't be as long as my first post was, on the hard days it might just be a non-creative picture followed by a short amount of text explaining how I feel or maybe just some depressing quote out of a book but I am going to try my hardest to post everyday so that when 2017 comes around (eek!), I have something to recap on. You can find that post and more explanation about it here.

So, recap. 

Well, I finished my last year at school and joined Animal Care at community college. I met some great people and actually made friends with them. I visited my family a whole lot this year, which I'm obviously very happy about. I didn't read as much as I wanted to, my reading goal was never finished and is way below the belt. But I have got into more things, I'm finding myself more, I matured a lot (but not enough, I have had a few downfalls and dips). All in all, I never really did anything this year that was memorable or worth documenting at all. Just like everyone else, I want this year to be different but I know that this enthusiastic spirit won't last and my motivation to keep going will probably start to fade in just a couple of weeks. I need to keep creating things to look forward to (without wasting money!) and I should be okay.

Resolutions!

I don't usually create resolutions because I always fail them, but these are the things that I want to happen and will make an actual effort (a documented effort either on here on the blog I previously mentioned!) to achieve them and I will try my best not to quit or half-ass them. I want to be proud of myself, for once. And live a life worth living.

1. Lose weight.

A common one for many but I have been suffering with my weight since I was little. I used to be underweight in my kid years, due to an illness, and then when I could eat again I just gained the pounds like crazy. I was dealing with mental illness, a divorced family, moving to a different country and being bullied and the diagnosis of autism and it spiralled into an unhealthy eating habit I don't feel like I have control of. I'm 200 pounds and only 19 years of age, at a height of five foot seven. It's really bad, and I don't feel confident in my skin. At the very least, I want to make healthy changes to my diet to have a noticeable improvement come December.

2. Let out my creative side.

I have a craft box, I enjoy doing crafts and arts, but because I'm not good at it, I stopped, despite the fact that I really enjoy it. I don't like how society/media tell us that we have to stop doing something if we're not good at it and I don't like that so much. I want to pain and write and build and well, create. It's just fun and I don't want to have to not do it. 

3. Learn to play at least one song on my keyboard. 

I got the keyboard as a present from my mother months ago and I don't even know the keys! I've never even tried to learn the music sheets. That's certainly an aim. I'm not really sure how I'm going to go about it, I'm probably going to play a little bit everyday or study on it for maybe half an hour per day, and dedicate some time to crafts or gaming or doing coursework for college.

4. Improve myself.

I need to mature, become more independent/intelligent, learn how to handle situations I am thrown into better and become a less shitty person. I need to learn to take the right way into things and not the easy way. Among many flaws and faults in my person, I'm sure. I just want to be at least a little bit improved come December.

5. To learn to love myself, to conquer my demons and fears and to to let myself enjoy life.

Thank you ever so much for reading and I'll see you whenever my next post will be!

RE: Emma Blackery || Makeup Brands You THOUGHT Were Cruelty-Free

(none of this is my own research, this is notes taken from Emma Blackery's video to educate those who have not seen it and to look back on so I don't have to rewatch the ten minute video. If you want to see that video, click here)

China requires make-up to be tested on animals by law. If they sell in China, they have to conduct animal testing on their products meaning they care more about profit then they do about animal cruelty. 

TARTE - owned by a parent company that does animal testing, does no animal testing themselves. 

URBAN DECAY - bought my L'Oreal (who do conduct animal testing), who also sell in China. 

THE BODY SHOP - also bought by L'Oreal. 

BURT'S BEES - owned by a parent company that does animal testing. 

NARS - owned by a parent company that does animal testing. 

MAC - their parent company sell in China. 

BENEFIT - sell in China.

EOS - they sell in China. 

BATH AND BODY WORKS - cruelty free, but willing to test on animals if given the opportunity to sell in China.

Hi :)

I just wanted to talk, I suppose, because I never really use this and I think people who actually read my blog will know why but some of you don't. I started Animal Care Engagement in September and it finishes this Friday (I got in to Level 1 so I'll be back in January!) and me and my boyfriend of two years broke up in September, too. My holidays are back on when I finish Friday (around 11am, it's a short day...) so I want to get back into making some posts over the Christmas period as it's probably the only time off I'll get from work for a while and I get tired easily lately so I won't want to post much.

So, on Tuesday next week (22nd), I'm going away to England again to see my grandparents and this time around my sister is joining us too to see my dad and his girlfriend (who I'm not too fond of so I won't actively try to spend time with them). I'm not sure how long we'll be staying, not much longer then a week most likely. Because I won't be home for Christmas day, we are having an early Christmas with my mother on Monday (21st) and I'm pretty exited about it. I want to take lots of pictures and post them on here like I did last year (or...thought about doing last year, I can't remember if I actually did...) because it's just fun to share the times when I'm happy, especially when it's getting few and far between. 

But yes, I was just...happy about how things are turning out. I'm still getting over the break-up with my ex, but I'm sure I'll eventually get there. Toodle do! 

Bookish Pet Peeves! Part Two.

(an old post, sorry! this was written before the chaotic mess that is my life came about and I'd like to say some of these points don't make me as angry anymore, but they're all still my opinion so I'd still like to share it. enjoy)

If you wanted to see part one of this post but you missed it, you can click here to take you there. It wasn't all that interesting, though, just a lot of anger. 

Like, a lot.

Number Eleven. 

Love triangles. Especially when it's an obvious choice.. Looking at you, Twilight. 

Number Twelve. 

Why is every book being compared to The Hunger Games?!?!?!

Number Thirteen. 

When authors develop a society by themselves and create conflicts and action and all this cool, cool stuff but will do one of the two things. 

They'll either give no explanation towards how the society even got that way, or any developed detail on that society.

Or, they'll wait to the next book to solve the conflicts of this book. Like, no, the point of series' is that it's a contiuation of the story but the first book should do okay as a standalone. In my humble opinion. 

Number Fourteen. 

When a really strong, badass female charecter is weakened because of love. Love is supposed to make you stronger, not make you dependent and less of a person then you were. 

Number Fifteen. 

When authors continue a series when it doesn't have much more meat to add to the story so everything from there on out is pointless and boring...don't drag on a series when there's nothing left, authors. Please. 

Number Sixteen. 

When authors write a perfect, well-rounded person that has no flaw. 

Likewise, when a reader complains about a charecter because they are flawed and they act like any human probably would in a chaotic situation at a young age (Tris, guys. Tris). 

Number Seventeen. 

The author pretty much telling us this person is so and so without actually giving us any backup or proof that this is in anyway correct. Like, for example, saying "This guy is desirable" when at no point in the entire book did I like him, or saying "This girl is strong!" and there has been no point in the book where she has been strong. 

Number Eighteen. 

When I read something that gave no warning that it had spoilers in it. I was doing research for this post, and BAM! Spoiler for Stephen King's ending of "IT". I was planning to read that, it's on my bookshelf. How in the hell do you expect me to read a 1000+ book with anticipation for the ending when I already know it?! Man, I am fuming. 

Number Nineteen. 

When the ending of a book doesn't make sense, or when everything is resolved and sugary-sweet. What?

Number Twenty. 

When the cover gives away wayyyy too much of the plot THANKS A LOT. 

Number Twenty-One. 

"Wow, are we in a lot of trouble. Oh, lookie here! A big ball of conicidentally placed helpful tools that are perfect for what I need to do right in this very moment! Oh, yes!"

 Number Twenty-Two. 

Despite "My Sister's Keeper" being one of my most re-read books, I can't stand metaphours. Over-used metaphours, that is. 

Number Twenty-Three. 

Terribly written dialogue. 

"Did you watch last nights' episode of Breaking Bad?"

"Yeah, pretty good"

"It was"

"Wasn't it?"

Blegh. 

I do hope you enjoyed that. 

You probably didn't, you probably left really annoyed by my terrible spelling and structures, and my invalid points. 

But, they do anger me...it's the truth, y'all! 

Yeah, bye.

(A Late) Monday Missions #12

I'm slowly getting back into the blogging groove again and what better way to start then a talk about what I will be attempting to read throughout this month?

If you follow me on Goodreads, you'll know that for a good few days now I have been tackling through "Leviathan" by Scott Westerfeld and I'm still not even 100 pages into it. It's not that it's a bad book, it's a wonderful book. The part about the fencing was pretty dull, but it's been pretty good so far. I'm just having difficulty reading (yay, depression!). I'll be reading this at my own pace so it'll probably be what I'm reading next week, too, although I really want to get into Star Wars!

I'm also getting through some National Geographic's but obviously that's more light reading then getting stuck into a book.

Thank you for reading, hope my old readers are still around.

- Loz x

Personal || A Letter of Absence.

It's been a while, hasn't it? I feel like I owe you an update, so here that update is. As you know, I started community college but right now I'm just on an Engagement course. Level 1 doesn't start until January. It's called Animal Care. The reason why this impacted my ability to thing of ideas and to write them down was, well...I don't think there is much reason, but since starting college I haven't been reading either. My everyday sort of thing is that on Monday's, Tuesdays, and Fridays I walk two miles there and two miles back (and I usually don't eat till around 5pm, which I am changing because I need the energy). I'm in Wednesday too, except it's not 9am - 4pm, it's 9am - 12:15pm.

As you could probably tell from the last post, Austin and I broke up and he "ran" this with me. We had been together for two years, although it didn't come as a shock it was still a lot to take and still is. I'm coping fine, though. 

I was also having confidence problems in my writing skills (and again, I still am) so I'm probably going to turn this blog into more than what it is - much more than just books. I want to reach topics and talk about them (feminism, deforestation, that general road) to improve myself. It's going to be more like a blog of self-discovery, and I'll write on here when I want to more than scheduled. I think.

As you can probably tell, I'm still exhausted, I've been sick and feel pretty drained. Thank you for reading, I'll see you at...some point. 

- Loz.